Happy Halloween!

Alright... who was naughty and needs a spanking? ;-)

Please please pretty please...

I have to go to bed now cuz I feel like total shit... but I wanted to put in a quick plea to God to please let the Mets win tonight. Not because I give a shit about baseball... cuz I really don't... but just so I have something to be happy about - cuz after all, I feel like shit!

I won't know till tomorrow morning.. but here's hoping.

G O M E T S !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cheers,

S.

I made a boo-boo!

One of the things I value about being an American is the right to free speech. And last night my husband unlawfully had his constitutional rights revoked for something he wrote on his blog.

And I will admit, I got ticked about it, threw a fit so he erased it... and it wasn't right of me. If I can blab about Brett - he should be able to say whatever he wants to as well.

His blog was simply standing up for his juvenile behavior on Monday nights; when, instead of spending time with me, he'd rather spend it online with 20 or so other 30 something men playing a sim racing game.

I think it's silly.

But that doesn't give me the right to get mad.

So Dave...here's history in the making. I'm sorry; I was wrong. And while I still think your Monday night behavior is childish; you absolutely have every right to share with your readers that, at times, you can be an infantile dork. At least you're willing to admit it.

Cheers, S.

Mom, don't read this!

Everyone take a second and think about this word:

PORN

What comes to mind?

Is it dirty? Is it taboo? Is it habitual? Is it something only men do?

Doubt it.

It's on my mind right now because CNN is starting a mini series about men's addiction to porn, and I'm definitely going to set the DVR to record it!

So it brings to thought some things.

1) Is searching for porn on the internet wrong?
2) Are people who look at porn on the net cheating?
3) Is it disgusting?

I don't know about you, but I think not. I don't find it any different than going to the newsstand to buy Playboy! (Do people still do that?)

If you go to bed at night and want to pretend your wife is one of those "Barely legal" internet bimbos - good for you; I much prefer my Jeeter/Damon sandwich fantasy.


Cheers, S.

32 going on 20

WARNING: THIS POST IS CERTAINLY GOING TO PISS OFF SOME PEOPLE & OFFEND OTHERS. BUT THE REST OF YOU WILL ENJOY ANOTHER FUNNY NIGHT FULL OF DRAMA.


My friend and I went out to our old favorite hangout last night (see previous post in January - THE FULL MONTY...to find out where that is, if you don't know).

After taking a break from "that" place for close to nine months, when we walked in we recognized quickly that we would once again have to create our identities and mark our territory. No one at the door cheered and grabbed our asses when we walked in... the bartender ID'ed us before serving us (pointing out that the picture on my license was heinous), etc. We were foreigners in our own bar. We were no longer the rulers of the roost.

But soon the beer started flowing, the ambient music took over and we managed to find some friends to talk to. The night was going well.

It got better when we found one semi-sexy dancer to set our sights on. His name was Brett - who we soon found out could have been my son had I chosen to be promiscuous at a very young age...

So we sit down at the bar, watching the stage, our eyes flirting from dancer to dancer...transfixed on the upper body strength as they hung upside down on the pole by only one arm. Mmm.. Oh back to earth, Stacey... okay. Uhm... where was I? Yes, okay, transfixed.

Eyes glazed over and tongue hanging out, thinking thoughts that could probably get me arrested...A sudden blinding bright light was shining right in my eyes. "God damn," I said "what the BLEEP!"

There are now 3 extra large donut mongrels standing in front of me looking at me with smirks on their faces.

"I need to see your ID, Miss!" they said to me.

My friend, always jumping to my rescue kindly says, "She's BLEEPing older than me! Why don't you ask me for mine?"

Now I'm baffled... why is he asking me for ID? Is he a mind reader? I was only THINKING those things... Not like I was doing them... and were my thoughts really THAT illegal? It couldn't be... no... it wasn't... no way could he think I was UNDER AGE!!!

So I look through my wallet to get to my license...Those of you who have seen my pocket book...understand, this sometimes takes a while.

"We need to see your ID now," he said obviously agitated with my slow reaction time.

I mumbled off a bunch of not so nice things and then handed him my license.

By this time the whole bar was transfixed on me, watching to see what was going to happen.

"Do you have any other photo identification, Miss?" he said.

Now I'm pissed. "That photo was taken in May of 1998," I said. "It's me..." I glared. He stared. I stared back - never blinking.

I showed him my social security card, my credit cards and by this time was telling him where to shove it.

"You really should get a new picture," he said. I fought back every urge to stick out my tongue and say na na na na na na as he and his cronies strutted out of the bar.

Well so now I know what it's like to be involved in a police raid. Unfortunately for this pig, his night wasn't made by hauling some under-age drunk off to jail. and I was feeling pretty good about myself afterwards considering he thought I was 10+ years younger than I was.

So it was time to get back to the dancers...and brett...who suddenly looked much older to me for some reason! ;-)

Cheers,
S.

Yankees suck!

Not much else to say, except.... Go Mets!

Cheers,

S.

I'm a poet, don't you know it?

While I SHOULD be sleeping, it's not as much fun
As playing in my room and singing about sun
Instead of laying down like a good little gal
I decided to call on my most favorite pal
"Come play with me," I said - come do as I do
I know you can do it and I think you should, too!
Come play with me, while my mom isn't near
She won't know you did it, she won't be able to hear!
I'll go to sleep later, now let's laugh and let's cuddle
I promise, my best friend, we won't get in trouble!
Oh no... there's the light! I think we got snagged!
And now off to bed, I guess I'll be dragged.

Mazel Tov - Congratulations - Salud!

{Jocelyn was a bit unhappy seeing her mommy hold a baby... she is saying "No mommy, put it down, put it back, put it away!}

Many millions of mazel tovs and congratulations are going out to two of my good friends, Deanna and Hilarie on the births of their children.

Deanna gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, Hunter, (pictured with me above) on Friday - and Hilarie gave birth to twin girls, Delaney and Haley (sorry if I misspelled them) on Sunday. The twins are two months premature, so we're all praying they will be coming home soon.

Congratulations to Deanna & Reggie; Hilarie and Jeremy!

As Billy says... I'd rather laugh with the sinners...

...than die with the saints... and that's the topic of this evening's blog - on the night of Yom Kippur... perhaps the most holy of days in my religion.

I really don't talk about much of anything religious in my posts... and I don't expect tonight to be any different. Partly because I'm trying to suck down as much wine as I can before sundown...which has probably already passed, but I'll repent for that next year....

So anyway... in my religion we have one day that we are supposed to repent for our sins... so I can be as bad as I want on 364 days... as long as on this day, I fast for forgiveness. And tomorrow... call me Saint Stacey. I'm as angelic as they get according to God.

I'm not quite sure I get the logic in that, but nothing in religion ever really makes sense to me. I mean, who knows WHAT I did in the past year... but whatever I did or didn't do... how can it be made good just by simply doing NOTHING on one day.. I mean it should be the opposite.. you should have to clean the grout on your bath tub with a tooth brush... scrub the floor with your bare hands... something! But taking a day off from work, laying around doing nothing... isn't really punishment!

The only thing that really does stink is the whole not eating thing. Who made up these silly rules anyway?

Until sundown tomorrow...

Cheers,
S.